hey guys
so I decided to break my blog silence (after 2 days. Aren't I the strong one.) To be honest, my fingers have been itching to type. To tell you all everything that's happened. But today ...something big happened and it's killing me. I need to get it off my chest so I can move on. Basically, I got my first written warning at work. To be honest ...I kinda find that they didn't really get my side of the story about things. I didn't really think it would be a good idea to argue or "plead my case". I was also on the verge of tears. So yes. Today sort of sucked.
But what I wanted to say earlier this week was ...I don't feel welcome with this switch. I kind of feel like the outsider. I think I've been a bad councilor cause of it. I know like no one. I've never worked with these people except for Baseball Nerd and you know ...that doesn't count. and the kids? I don't know the kids. I feel like I'm never doing anything right. One kids a faker so when I give him sympathy, I get crap cause I didn't know. Fun right?
Basically, this week has been sort of depressing. I guess I can just prove to everyone next week that I don't care and I'm going to be the best councilor there.
Peace&Love
Friday, July 16, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
qutting ...
hello minions.
I don't really want to blog anymore. Apparently I complain a lot. Originally, I had planned on talking about my week so far at my new camp. But that will not be happening. I kind of just ..lost my motivation. I mean, I am who I am but apparently that isn't good enough for my "friends". I wont be blogging for a while. See how I warned you this time? I guess I'll be back whenever. I don't know when that is. I don't know if I will be back. I just don't know anymore.
I'm not quitting. Not really. I just kinda ...don't want to get crap from the people I care about most cause I've been getting a lot of that lately. And I can't take it anymore. The people whose opinions I value the most are hurting me because I'm not turning out how they wanted me to. It sucks when you count on people and they let you down. It's sort of ....sad I guess. I mean, I count on my friends and they just ...do this. I can't really get into it here. I just wanted to say bye before I disappear from the blogging world ...
Peace&Love, I love you guys.
I don't really want to blog anymore. Apparently I complain a lot. Originally, I had planned on talking about my week so far at my new camp. But that will not be happening. I kind of just ..lost my motivation. I mean, I am who I am but apparently that isn't good enough for my "friends". I wont be blogging for a while. See how I warned you this time? I guess I'll be back whenever. I don't know when that is. I don't know if I will be back. I just don't know anymore.
I'm not quitting. Not really. I just kinda ...don't want to get crap from the people I care about most cause I've been getting a lot of that lately. And I can't take it anymore. The people whose opinions I value the most are hurting me because I'm not turning out how they wanted me to. It sucks when you count on people and they let you down. It's sort of ....sad I guess. I mean, I count on my friends and they just ...do this. I can't really get into it here. I just wanted to say bye before I disappear from the blogging world ...
Peace&Love, I love you guys.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Greetings minions!!
So I woke up to a rather odd text message this morning from BP. He was being awfully nice to me and now I am completely confused and not too sure where I stand with him. Are we or are we not friends? So as I'm in bed staring at my phone with the look of a total moron on my face, I decided to reply. After about a couple messages I got the guts to ask what was up. Especially after the phone call yesterday, all he did was insult me and made me cry at the Jean-Coutu, I was really wondering why the hell he was being so damn nice to me. Apparently he's trying to stop the fighting. Now we all know by now I'm kind of a pessimist, so this nice-ness will not last. I know it. I always do. I mean, not to be mean or anything but he's always on my back about SOMETHING you know? Nothing I ever do is good enough.
On another note, I got addicted to making these like rope bracelets. It's soo much fun. I swear by the end of the summer I'll have like a bunch on my wrist and ankles. :PP Most of you probably think "Ew dude. Be a girl and wear real bracelets." But you know what, only the best tandem in the world COCONUT would understand. :P She went to convocation with a bunch on her wrist. Teehee!!
Today is my dad's birthday so HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!! We are going to my aunts house and I will be seeing My Almost Cousin and my real cousins and it will be just so much funnzz :) I actually like adore that side of my family. Like I feel excited to see them. Usually when my mom anounces we will be seeing family today, I die a little on the inside. But when I see my aunt S ...Well then that's another story!! The only thing that is irksome is that I am up. On a sunday. At 10:30. It's like absolutely ick.
Peace&Love :)
So I woke up to a rather odd text message this morning from BP. He was being awfully nice to me and now I am completely confused and not too sure where I stand with him. Are we or are we not friends? So as I'm in bed staring at my phone with the look of a total moron on my face, I decided to reply. After about a couple messages I got the guts to ask what was up. Especially after the phone call yesterday, all he did was insult me and made me cry at the Jean-Coutu, I was really wondering why the hell he was being so damn nice to me. Apparently he's trying to stop the fighting. Now we all know by now I'm kind of a pessimist, so this nice-ness will not last. I know it. I always do. I mean, not to be mean or anything but he's always on my back about SOMETHING you know? Nothing I ever do is good enough.
On another note, I got addicted to making these like rope bracelets. It's soo much fun. I swear by the end of the summer I'll have like a bunch on my wrist and ankles. :PP Most of you probably think "Ew dude. Be a girl and wear real bracelets." But you know what, only the best tandem in the world COCONUT would understand. :P She went to convocation with a bunch on her wrist. Teehee!!
Today is my dad's birthday so HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!! We are going to my aunts house and I will be seeing My Almost Cousin and my real cousins and it will be just so much funnzz :) I actually like adore that side of my family. Like I feel excited to see them. Usually when my mom anounces we will be seeing family today, I die a little on the inside. But when I see my aunt S ...Well then that's another story!! The only thing that is irksome is that I am up. On a sunday. At 10:30. It's like absolutely ick.
Peace&Love :)
Friday, July 9, 2010
Drama drama drama!/camp update!!!!!!!!!!! :D
Hey minions!!
So after a FULL legit week of work, I can honestly say I am dead tired. I actually ended up working about 9-10 hour shifts wednesday, thursday and friday so it was quite long. Often enough, the kids didn't really listen to me. We went to the RECREATECH on wednesday. Longest. Day. Ever. I'm not even joking. But now it is the weekend I get to sleep in and relax (while my fellow councilors are all camping and getting dead tired) before my lovely week at a new camp(got switched) at ACTIVE CAMP WOO!! I will be with the older kids so it shall be interesting!! I think .. :)) only downside is I have no idea how I will be getting there. I might rollerblade since it isn't that far. A little, but it isn't so bad.
I started a contemporary class at my dance studio recently...it's not easy but I love it!! I kinda hurt my ankle though. I've had to wrap it everyday this week!! Gah!! And I am being questioned everyday because of it. Oh well, I'll live.
On another note, I miss my bffl :(( I haven't seen her since I've started with these mad crazy hours!! And this week my hours are almost the same so yeah, it'll be interesting. :\ I miss her very much and I'm trying to figure out when I can see her!! This weekend I'm mad busy since it's my dad's b-day so Iunno what to do!! I'm only part time monday and tuesday next week ... D: OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! What shall I do !?
SO do you guys remember when I said drama was over? It's back. Apparently I'm acting like a @#!*% . But I'm not, I never act like this blablabla. I'm sorry, but I haven't changed? I didn't do @#!*% all wrong? And now I'm getting crap and he won't leave me alone. It's like ...why does he feel the need to pick fights with me?! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING AND HE'S GETTING MAD AT ME!! I don't @#!*% get it. Yeah, I swore. Which I rarely do (here)but you know what? I just don't care right now. It's like, he keeps making these like "threats". Things such as "When you act like this, I don't want to talk to you or chill with you." It's like, oh okay uhm so basically, Dancin'ThruLife change your attitude or else I ditch you as a friend. Oh yeah. REEEAAAAL mature pal. Urg. And then making all these effing assumptions?! I talk about his behind his back!? Trash talk him?! YEAH RIGHT. What so he hears it from ONE PERSON and automatically assumes it's true!?
Eff this.
Peace&Love
P.S. Notice how I didn't mention "his" name. "He" doesn't like me using his name. Even if it's not "his" real name. Cause apparently, "he" has the right to tell me what to write on my blog. I think I'll just name "him" Bipolar. Cause "he" always changes "his" mind. So from now on, when I mention "him", it's Bipolar.
So after a FULL legit week of work, I can honestly say I am dead tired. I actually ended up working about 9-10 hour shifts wednesday, thursday and friday so it was quite long. Often enough, the kids didn't really listen to me. We went to the RECREATECH on wednesday. Longest. Day. Ever. I'm not even joking. But now it is the weekend I get to sleep in and relax (while my fellow councilors are all camping and getting dead tired) before my lovely week at a new camp(got switched) at ACTIVE CAMP WOO!! I will be with the older kids so it shall be interesting!! I think .. :)) only downside is I have no idea how I will be getting there. I might rollerblade since it isn't that far. A little, but it isn't so bad.
I started a contemporary class at my dance studio recently...it's not easy but I love it!! I kinda hurt my ankle though. I've had to wrap it everyday this week!! Gah!! And I am being questioned everyday because of it. Oh well, I'll live.
On another note, I miss my bffl :(( I haven't seen her since I've started with these mad crazy hours!! And this week my hours are almost the same so yeah, it'll be interesting. :\ I miss her very much and I'm trying to figure out when I can see her!! This weekend I'm mad busy since it's my dad's b-day so Iunno what to do!! I'm only part time monday and tuesday next week ... D: OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! What shall I do !?
SO do you guys remember when I said drama was over? It's back. Apparently I'm acting like a @#!*% . But I'm not, I never act like this blablabla. I'm sorry, but I haven't changed? I didn't do @#!*% all wrong? And now I'm getting crap and he won't leave me alone. It's like ...why does he feel the need to pick fights with me?! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING AND HE'S GETTING MAD AT ME!! I don't @#!*% get it. Yeah, I swore. Which I rarely do (here)but you know what? I just don't care right now. It's like, he keeps making these like "threats". Things such as "When you act like this, I don't want to talk to you or chill with you." It's like, oh okay uhm so basically, Dancin'ThruLife change your attitude or else I ditch you as a friend. Oh yeah. REEEAAAAL mature pal. Urg. And then making all these effing assumptions?! I talk about his behind his back!? Trash talk him?! YEAH RIGHT. What so he hears it from ONE PERSON and automatically assumes it's true!?
Eff this.
Peace&Love
P.S. Notice how I didn't mention "his" name. "He" doesn't like me using his name. Even if it's not "his" real name. Cause apparently, "he" has the right to tell me what to write on my blog. I think I'll just name "him" Bipolar. Cause "he" always changes "his" mind. So from now on, when I mention "him", it's Bipolar.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
TWIN :D
I seem to have gotten a moskito bite. I don't know where the hell it came from but it's on my leg and bothering me to a great extent at the moment.
Anyways. I don't know if I've ever told you guys but at formation I discovered my long lost Twin ;D Basically what happened was we were talking (we went to the same school and we were discussing student council and such) and Rainbow walks up to us and asks if we are sibs. Twin says we are. We are twins in fact. We then later found out we have THE SAME BIRTHDAY. Weird is it not? And we happen to be quite alike :P Long story short/reason why I brought this up, I am seeing Twin Wednesday on our camp outing with the kids and we decided to wear a pink or green bandanna on our arms to display our Twin-ness. How cool is that?! Yeah. Thought so. ;D
Peace&Love
Anyways. I don't know if I've ever told you guys but at formation I discovered my long lost Twin ;D Basically what happened was we were talking (we went to the same school and we were discussing student council and such) and Rainbow walks up to us and asks if we are sibs. Twin says we are. We are twins in fact. We then later found out we have THE SAME BIRTHDAY. Weird is it not? And we happen to be quite alike :P Long story short/reason why I brought this up, I am seeing Twin Wednesday on our camp outing with the kids and we decided to wear a pink or green bandanna on our arms to display our Twin-ness. How cool is that?! Yeah. Thought so. ;D
Peace&Love
Just stuff.
Hey minions!!
So I haven't blogged in a couple days ...I haven't done so since work has absolutely exhausted me. But watever. I still love my job. Wednesday we went to Alice In Wonderland. It's like Santa Claus's Village except not. So I went on these spinning apple thingies cause a couple kids wanted me to and I ended up getting really really sick ...It was Not Fun. Needless to say the rest of my day sorta didn't go so great. I'm glad I had Thursday off though to recuperate.
It's finally Saturday. I've been waiting for this day all week and yet ...I can't wait to go back to work. My mom and I fought. And now she's giving me the silent treatment. Lovely. I did not know we were back in KINDERGARTEN. Urg. It drives me absolutely INSANE because you know what?! For ONCE in my @#!*% life I had the courage to tell her exactly how I felt and she just got all mad and stuff.
On another note, I am fairly certain that drama is over between "him" and I. But you never know with me. Being the insufferable @#!*% I am right?
Peace&Love
So I haven't blogged in a couple days ...I haven't done so since work has absolutely exhausted me. But watever. I still love my job. Wednesday we went to Alice In Wonderland. It's like Santa Claus's Village except not. So I went on these spinning apple thingies cause a couple kids wanted me to and I ended up getting really really sick ...It was Not Fun. Needless to say the rest of my day sorta didn't go so great. I'm glad I had Thursday off though to recuperate.
It's finally Saturday. I've been waiting for this day all week and yet ...I can't wait to go back to work. My mom and I fought. And now she's giving me the silent treatment. Lovely. I did not know we were back in KINDERGARTEN. Urg. It drives me absolutely INSANE because you know what?! For ONCE in my @#!*% life I had the courage to tell her exactly how I felt and she just got all mad and stuff.
On another note, I am fairly certain that drama is over between "him" and I. But you never know with me. Being the insufferable @#!*% I am right?
Peace&Love
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Camp(L) /DRAMA. -.-
Hello minions!!
So I got my report card on monday and I passed everything! So no summer school for moi!! So camp has been going great. A little exhausting, but hey kids are exhausting. They have a lot more energy than us old folks ;D We went on our first outing today. Man was it stressful. It always makes me nervous going to these things cause we don't know the place. You can be dealing with fighting children one second, a kid walks away and BAM missing kid. Thankfully for me, this has never happened. But these are the things that make me nervous. I think too much.
On another note, drama is even MORE present today than ever. I actually really really hate it. I think it's just exhausting me even more. Like ...I'm already dead tired from camp and now all this STUFF is happening. It's driving me insane. I can't wait till it ends. I mean, people need to just leave me alone. It's as if they enjoy causing me pain. As if they enjoy what they put me through every single day since May 4th. Yeah, I remember the date all of this bullpoo started. Weird eh? Not really. It's a day that changed my life for ever.
Peace&Love
So I got my report card on monday and I passed everything! So no summer school for moi!! So camp has been going great. A little exhausting, but hey kids are exhausting. They have a lot more energy than us old folks ;D We went on our first outing today. Man was it stressful. It always makes me nervous going to these things cause we don't know the place. You can be dealing with fighting children one second, a kid walks away and BAM missing kid. Thankfully for me, this has never happened. But these are the things that make me nervous. I think too much.
On another note, drama is even MORE present today than ever. I actually really really hate it. I think it's just exhausting me even more. Like ...I'm already dead tired from camp and now all this STUFF is happening. It's driving me insane. I can't wait till it ends. I mean, people need to just leave me alone. It's as if they enjoy causing me pain. As if they enjoy what they put me through every single day since May 4th. Yeah, I remember the date all of this bullpoo started. Weird eh? Not really. It's a day that changed my life for ever.
Peace&Love
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